


depth, breadth, height

by lileau



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 23:35:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17497463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lileau/pseuds/lileau
Summary: The ways in which Kurt and Blaine love each other.





	depth, breadth, height

**Author's Note:**

> this is very short and rambly but i just wanted to write about kurt and blaine loving each other :') title is inspired by sonnet 43 by elizabeth barrett browning

Kurt wasn't built for love. He has so much to give but he guards it, it's very precious to him. He loves his mom, from the moment he's even vaguely aware of what love is - can't remember ever not loving her. It's not the same after she's gone. He still loves her, so much, but he has nowhere to put his love. There's too much of it, it feels like it's about to burst out of his skull. His dad is there, and of course Kurt loves him, but there's something stopping him from giving the same kind of love he gave so freely to his mom.

He doesn't realise what that something is until he's holding back tears in his bedroom and telling his dad that he's gay. 

"I love you just as much," his dad says, and the dam breaks. He pours so much love into the hug he gives his dad that he feels empty afterwards, drained. But his life gets a little brighter that day, like morning sun filtering in through the blinds.

The blinds open when Kurt meets Blaine. On the stairs, looking into this boy's face, he feels like he needs to lift a hand to his eyes to shade himself from the sun. 

He doesn't, he lets it in. 

It's easy to love Blaine from the get-go. What's not easy is watching Blaine chase another guy, or watching him shoot Kurt down on valentine's day, or watching him (very briefly) date his best friend. But it's easy to love him through it, so easy that Kurt doesn't even really realise he's doing it until Blaine kisses him. Kurt had known he liked Blaine - if the pain in his chest every time Blaine talked about another guy was anything to go by - but the second Blaine's lips touch his he's stunned and he's hungry and he knows this feeling. It feels like warm, liquid joy is flowing out of his fingertips where they're cupping Blaine's jaw. Blaine smiles against his lips, and Kurt thinks maybe he can feel it too.

Blaine was built for love. It's a pleasure, loving him.

Loving comes to him so naturally, his eyes are practically overflowing with it when Kurt wakes up the morning after they sleep together for the first time. Blaine's watching him under heavy-lidded eyes, a soft smile on his lips that grows when he notices Kurt's eyes have opened, until Blaine's positively beaming at him across the pillow. Kurt soaks it up, the warmth of this sweet boy who chooses to give his love so freely to him. Kurt reaches out for him, and Blaine comes willingly even though he must be sore, shuffling towards him until his face is pressed against Kurt's bare chest. He traces his fingers down Blaine's back, leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake.

"I love you so much," Kurt whispers into his hair, because he needs to. He doesn't show his love as effortlessly as Blaine does, so he plans on saying it every day for the rest of his life. Multiple times every day, if that's what it takes for Blaine to never doubt it. 

Blaine doesn't need to say it, because it's made so very obvious by the gentle, sleepy kisses that are currently being planted on Kurt’s collarbone. He says it anyway, whispers, "I love you, too," into Kurt's skin. Kurt smiles and rolls them over so Blaine is pinned underneath him.

When they break up, both times, Kurt once again starts to believe that he wasn't made for love. This doubt is quenched every time he even thinks about Blaine because he realises that even through heartbreak and unbearable pain and anger, he never stops loving. Never stops loving him. Maybe that's why Kurt kisses him in the backseat of his car in a church parking lot. Maybe that's why Kurt drags him into a hotel room later that night and fucks him slow and sweet and tender; far too intimate for whatever they're pretending to be.

It would be less painful, he thinks, to not love Blaine. Maybe then he could love the cute boy from the NYADA acapella group, or the receptionist at vogue.com who asks him out at least once a week. But he can't, not really. Not when his heart is still firmly in Blaine's hands.

When Blaine comes back to him, it feels right. Everything falls into place, and he says his vows with complete honesty and watches Blaine do the same. They dance and kiss and leave their own wedding early because they have some catching up to do. They talk on the bed of the honeymoon suite that Santana booked for them, but Blaine keeps getting distracted by Kurt's shoulders in that shirt. So they alternate between talking and fucking until they're smart enough to move the talking away from the bed, to the dining table where they sit opposite each other. They talk about what they've missed, they talk about how they're feeling and they talk about what they need to do going forward so they don't make the same mistakes again.

Kurt says, "I love you, husband," and Blaine's eyes glaze over. He stands and walks around the table to settle himself into Kurt's lap, where he kisses him, desperate and needy. It turns out, the dining table isn't just for talking anymore.

Kurt wakes up before Blaine, his chest to Blaine's back. He can feel Blaine's chest rising and falling steadily, and Kurt's surprised he doesn't feel overwhelmed. He’d thought he might wake up and regret getting married on a whim, but with Blaine in his arms, he feels none of that, only excitement for the rest of their life.

Kurt kisses Blaine's shoulder, and steps into the sun.


End file.
